07 AMINI: Paint…

5.30am. An opportune time for me to paint Amini from its darkness to marvelous light. I’m going to lie about a blue sun rising on a yellow sky. My brush will stroke Mzee pacing through the 8 phases of the high-rise estate to deliver papers for his friends who are too frail to get out of bed. I will show Peter, through the wooden frame of his kiosk’s window, kneeling to present his requests before the Most High. With a charcoal pastel, I will design Professor Lach’s Kaunda suit as he quickly makes his way to the shopping area. Confessions will be made about Kayamba’s faded trousers firmly held up by matching suspenders. He will perch himself alongside Lach for a careful examination of Saturday’s daily.

I will throw a Pashmina shawl over Mama Frosa’s caramel nightdress to hide the slight rip on her left armpit. As usual, she will be buying eggs for her never-ending guests; a generous and warm soul she is. A royal blue and bright orange ‘Asiyefunzwa na mamaye hufunzwa na ulimwengu’ lesso will be seen respectfully wrapped around her African hips, her graying hair held together with a yellow scarf. Jeremiah will playfully dare her to a race after picking up cigarettes for his once-in-a-week visiting dad oblivious that this man who always gives him an extra shilling for candy isn’t really his father.

Dominik wa Phase 5 will be sharing a moment with the cabbies after his 10km run. Today he will meet their chai bill with the solitary intention of flirting with Cheupe. This white flower is as attractive as the coconut mandazis she peddles; absolutely no fault in her being. I will gossip about the Matatu drivers who opt for Mama Kadogo’s githeri served alongside Mama Raha’s porridge. Only a heavy meal can take them through Nairobi’s frenetic traffic. At the far edge of the frame, you will observe white passenger vans all with the yellow government mark queued up for a thorough scrub.

10.30am. The incomplete canvas rests from the ambitious strokes of my identical paintbrushes. This time I do not procrastinate about switching off the balcony lights. Amini will be beautiful when the government is done with re-carpeting its  roads. No longer will she be a blurry figment of my imagination or a painting that an enthused tourist can buy at the crafts market. It will be a truth that even our rattily automobiles will be too ashamed to talk ill about. Finally a reason to trade my Nissan B14 for a German machine and the company will no longer have a reason to withhold my promotion. There is a knock at the door. I haven’t showered but it doesn’t matter. Weekends were made for this – a painter and his model.2

The Epistle of L. F. Scolari…

This past week I had the awesome privilege of attending Biko Zulu’s Creative Writing Master Class… An absolutely inspiring guy I must say… Here is my best submission for the class…

Image source here

I am annoyed. I am ashamed. I am anguished. How is it that a man of my calibre would bring such disrepute to this great nation? O how I wish it was another day, another time when we did not have the world at our stage. I hear the jeers in their celebration and sneers in their auf wiedersehens. I cannot imagine they will drink from the cup. Our cup! Curse the lineage of the octopus that ever thought to prophesy in their favour! May her eggs never rise to shore again.

Now they say it, that I should have left a long time back. That the 11-man army should have been led by a dark man, a tall man, a handsome man. Nonsense! Utter nonsense! A man is a man is a man. O my stomach churns at the tearful pains of my sons stripped of their yellow grassy blue pride. No more samba, no more choro, just weakened men thirsting for a noose.

But though a man falls 7 times, yet he shall rise again. And so I say to you my Ronaldinho that in the mid of the field your attack will rise again.  And in your defense my dear Thiago, I swear to you that your shoulder will rise again. And to you Julio, my very son Cesar I pray that your very hands will rise again. And to Neymar, my Captain and King, I decree and declare that your golden feet will rise again. I have no doubt, absolutely no doubt that Bresil will rise again.

Tesha Mongi © March 2016

Bethsaida…

Image source here

Life is catching up with me

I am not as strong as I used to be

It takes me an hour to get here

Another hour to leave here

Those who cannot see

Those who cannot hear

Those who cannot speak

Those like me

All come here

The one with money is fortunate

The one with a family even more fortunate

One day we will be the ones

I’ve asked Sayyda to marry me

“But how can a marry what I cannot see?”

She remembers the 17 years here

And the 38 we celebrate today

“I see you…”

I tell her

“You are beautiful…”

I whisper to her

She will marry the one who immerses her in the waters

The one strong enough to carry her weakness

If I had money

I would pay for her immersion

If I had a family

I would make sure they did it

Just so that she could see her very reflection

Sayyda is beautiful

But for my very now

And my very here

I desire to be immersed

But for a moment

Against Bethsaida and its scorching sun

Tesha Mongi © October 2015 – adapted from John

Sometimes…

Feather pen set of abstract colour
Image source Google search

Sometimes it sounds odd when I tell my friends (or anyone for that matter) that I love to write when there is really nothing to show for it. Sometimes I feel that I don’t have the time to write. Sometimes I feel I have too many stories to write and don’t know where to start. Sometimes it’s just feels like so much work and I already have a day job. Sometimes it is an excuse. Sometimes it is laziness. But sometimes it is injustice to the one who has the gift.

The gift unpacks the skill and the skill unpack the calling ~ D. Mavia

BUT because I always smile at the sometimes deep things I write, the sometimes seemingly silly things I write, and the sometimes very amateurish things I write, I will write. Whether amateur or pro, a writer MUST write FUN SIZED STUFF!

Beautiful…

Image source here

This place is beautiful

But I am ugly

And ugly is what my life looks like

When time came for me to crawl, I barely moved

He is not the crawling type,” they thought

Then time came for me to stand, I barely moved

He is the later-in-life kind of child,” they thought

Finally in my 3rd year of life

The doctors confirmed I would barely move

Barely!

Mama would prop me on a table each morning

And it was by our wooden door I lived

My brothers herded, my sisters fetched water

Sometimes they played with it

Made clay balls, they had so much fun

Their friends would join in, it was so much fun

They always said hello. They always wished I played

Eventually they left

Papa also left. Mama quickly followed him

God will take care of you.” they bade

My brother did everything he could

But then came his ‘mamacita

And every morning since they drop me here

At first I was angry, very angry

I am sure my parents would have been very angry

A beggar!

Their son turned a beggar!

But it is beautiful here

I see beautiful children – very beautiful children

I see beautiful men – well their hearts are

I see beautiful women – with large beautiful eyes

My sister says there is a peasant girl

A very beautiful peasant girl

Waiting for me if I fetch enough silver

And for love, I will fetch that silver

With pitiable theatrics, with powerful theatrics, with put-some-money-in-my-cup theatrics

I will fetch even gold and alas here it comes!

But these men are different

Though the temple bells ring, they rush not

They kneel leaning towards me

Silver or gold they obviously do not have

But in the name of the Nazarene

In the name of the Nazarene

They help me hop, I skip, I jump

It is beautiful I tell you! Beautiful…

Tesha Mongi © September 2015 – adapted from Acts

Of Coaches and Amens…

Image source here

Over the weekend I was with one of my coaches… (You can read about him here…) and I was explaining to him what a coach does 🙂 To cut my long story short, see excerpt below…

COACH Wise

How long have I known you? 8 years, right?

Right…

And do you have friends you’ve known a long time?

Yes…

Do you think it has ever counted to them the type of VERT you are?

No, not really…

And do you know any VERTs with your very inclination?

But of course, there is Aye, Bee, and See…

Aren’t they great people?

Yes they are…

So explain to me what you understand as the differences between the 2 *VERTABRAEs?

One turns outwardly to the world of behavior, action, people, and things and the other turns inwardly to the world of ideas and reflection. O yeah and there is the ambivertabrae who stands somewhere right in the middle of Jung’s & Myer’s propositions…

So why is it that you wish to morph into another VERT? Don’t you know that your bones are of God?

Now that I think of it, I do not want to convert…

And with that my dear, always remember that God has allowed you to become the best of YOU and it is what is in you that matters most

(*smile of relief*)

Amen?

**Amen!

___

*VERTABRAE – any of the bones composing the spinal column, consisting typically of a cylindrical body and an arch with various processes, and forming a foramen, or opening, through which the spinal cord passes

**AMEN – a declaration of affirmation found in the Hebrew Bible and the New Testament. Its use in Judaism dates back to its earliest text. It has been generally adopted in Christian worship as a concluding word for prayers and hymns. In Islam, it is the standard ending to Dua (supplication). Common English translations of the word amen include “verily” and “truly”

Of Coaches and 2014…

Image source here

So yesterday I was hanging out with one of my coaches… And we were discussing the things that bring joy… Well here goes…

July 6, 2014

Dear Uncle Scolari,

I hope you’ve been watching 🙂 See you Tuesday!

Sincerely

Your Niece 🙂

July 8, 2014

Dear Ref,

You are invited to play with us.

Yes I am not ashamed 🙂

As for Zuniga,

Let us not find you roaming on the streets of Rio 🙂

Scolari’s Niece

July 9, 2014

Dear Uncle Scolari,

Just want you to know that I still have my jersey on despite the obliteration, annihilation and desecration that this evening has been. I wish I could cry but I really don’t get that part of football; one day hubby will explain 🙂 And though this is bad history for a country whose national sport is football, some day the team will rise to the occasion and the kids of our kids kids will hear and witness the great turnaround. Even the mighty fall 🙂

I haven’t called Baba but I can hear his every 2-minute intermittent hearty laughter penetrate my walls as he recounts the play. O boy! I know he will call, not to gloat, but to give his sincere ‘poles’. But such is life na asiyekubali kushindwa si mshindani. And though we could slither to position #3 on Saturday, the truth is Uncle that more work is needed. But do pat yourself a little because the overall performance was definitely better than SA 2010. SA was bad /o\

In related stories, I have been receiving hate mail, sorry mail and all sorts of mail because of my stand. I stood with you in 1994 and I feel no differently today. And so I send my a million hugs to you, my cousin Cesar, Neymar, Thiago, Gonzalez, David Luiz, Paulinho, Fernandinho, Gustavo, Marcelo and the entire squad. I know Cafu, Dunga, Bebeto, Denilson, Rivaldo, Ronaldo, Roberto Carlos, Ronaldinho are equally concerned so it is not a battle that you do not have to fight alone. #TukoWengi #TukoPamoja

OK, I need to be at work tomorrow, sorry today… So sending lots of hugs, hugs and more hugs. But do remember Saturday, we need a ‘kufutia machozi’

Lotsa Hugs ♥ ♥ ♥

Ms Felipa 🙂

July 13, 2014

Dear Uncle Scolari

I didn’t make it to the pitch yesterday but seeing the results today, I’m glad I didn’t. And with that kind of play, I don’t think we will even qualify for Russia.

It is time for a new crop of players, players with extensive international exposure. Beach football is not FIFA complaint.

It is time to re-toughen the team’s work so that if Neymar is knocked, Fred or Gustavo or any other man can cover for him. Better still, improve their weight so that no Zuniga can ever threaten them.

It is time for a new coach because it is disrespectful for you and Jurgen to share an era 🙂

Sincerely

Felipa Muller (yes he proposed) ♥ ♥ ♥

July 14, 2014

Congratulations Germany!

You most certainly deserved it! It’s a wrap, it’s been real, it’s been Brazil 2014!

L♥tsa L♥ve Felipa Scolari-Muller 🙂

06 AMINI: The Government…

I choose to perch at Kalu’s to give time for the giggles to dissipate. Lord, how I pray that I will not make it to the Amini tabloid with the caption “Of mobile phones and texting women!” If anyone in the company saw it, the long awaited promotion would sure be gone. I must admit though that I would be curious to see the proportions of weight the Amini Stars (the gazette company) would accord my caricature. Kalu hands me a second banana; food is best served when hungry.

As I sit on this puff, or what was previously a wooden tomato carton but now cleverly draped in a white silk sack, I notice a drosophila melanogaster traversing the space. It is the only fly along this line of almost 10 grocers. 20 months back, lackadaisical structures, garbage-laced landscapes and the chocking pungency from the council’s public room was commonplace. But then came an official who dreamed of a new Amini and now we boast of kiosks that troubled men enough to yield to their wives demands of “How can ‘dukas’ look classier than our homes?”. In fact, this was a subject of discussion in one of the estate meetings and by the next quarter, residents of Phase IV were the proud occupants of freshly painted and aptly re-branded “Terra Cotta” flats. The generosity of colours used won the council’s heart and our longstanding request of a concrete perimeter fencing was honoured. Soon the rest of Amini got wind of the government’s incentive and was all up in brushes.

“Habari ya msichana?” (How is the girl?)

“Poa kabisa!” (Very well!)

“Mnaendelea vizuri?” (All is well?)

“Kabisa! Kabisa!” (Very very well!)

Conversing in 3rd person is the norm here and conversations can get move from subtly hilarious to extremely intense. I must confess, though, that some discussions can be quite therapeutic giving you the chance to step away from self and be an ombudsman. Only in this case there may not necessarily be any complaints lodged against yourself.

“Otherwise?” (Translated “How is life treating you?” in Nairobi)

“Ni ku-hustle tu.” (The rat race as usual)

“Hustle lazima.” (Yap! There really isn’t any other way out)

“Familia inaendelea vipi?” (How is your family?)

“Poa sana. Actually saa hii tu nimetoka kuongea na madam akinieleza story za mjunior. Kameanza kusimama simama.”

He smiles proudly of his 9 month old son who is soon to walk. There is a noticeable shrill in his voice as he anticipates visiting them over Christmas; they live up country.

“Msichana wako ashaanza kujikalisha? (Is your daughter now sitting on her own?)

Sitting? O my goodness! It is at this point that I realize that when our conversation begun, Kalu was just addressing one person. Me! and he definitely has me confused with someone else. My mind races through the 8 phases of Amini but I cannot quite come up with a lookalike. The kilos added in the past few months must have convinced his imagination that I was with child, 5 or 6 months old. I have never been with a man in a way that would warrant me to be a mama. I obviously would love to be one, probably of twins, but all this pizza is giving me a false persona. But how is it that a man from whom I have bought provisions for over 3 years takes me for another? I mean I am here almost every week binging on his musa acuminatas. Those bananas are equally guilty! Then again SaraMarie’s Caleb was telling us the other day that men can say anything. Anything enough to get them the answers they want. Answers to place themselves in a position. A position of strategy.

About the same moment of his interrogation, a group of customers alight from a disco-ridden matatu and crowd Kalu’s ‘reception’ area. The freshly cut slices of watermelons have attracted them or perhaps the hot December sun has forced them to seek this waterlogged fruit. “Hizi zimetoka TZ.” He advertises. I bet they say the same in Tanzania. Snob appeal the marketers call it. I pick my bag, my folder, my phone and then proceed to step on the plastic pedal that lifts the lid of this almost new stainless steel rubbish bin. Remarkable progress is what these grocers have made. If it was yesteryear no one would have really cared if you dropped a peel on the ground but the government came, the government saw and the government cemented and tiled each of the floors of these cabins. Long live the government! Long live!2

05 AMINI: The Company…

Boy am I hungry! We had to work through lunch on an urgent client proposal and did not manage to grab anything to eat. And the fact that Caleb and SaraMarie dropped me 2 kilometres from Amini does not help the situation. The company is keen on image and for this reason I hurriedly walk past the maize man. I must assume that his hot, charcoal-filled roast stand bears no grain. Yes I am blind to the guy who immerses half a lemon into the coconut shell overflowing with chili granules and proceeds to hungrily marinates his smoking corn. Self-control is not a joke but for the company anything can be done.

A message alert comes in. It is the Geneva traveling client. He has just sent a photo of himself at Jet d’Eau. This magnificent 130 year old fountain that rises 450 feet high presents Lake Geneve in its majestic splendor. Yonder, he explains, lives the rich; one of the villas is rumoured to belong to Lewis Hamilton. It is absolutely beautiful! If only Nairobi had so much to give, then Amini residents would not have to set their alarms for endless nights to fetch the limited council’s water.

A second photo comes through. In this one, he is under a seat that is six times his height. It is Daniel Berset’s broken chair that stands unashamedly in front of the Palais des Nations (United Nations Palace) and joins activists in protesting landmines. Amazing how a basic household item can be such a profound work of art. “If you think this is astounding,” the sojourner adds, “Check out this video.” I wait a few seconds for the clip to download. Whatsapp really is a wonderful application. The chair is graced by trick fountains that dance arrhythmically at the concrete square; it is definitely worth filming. A few tourists opt to ward off the summer heat by standing on fountain spots for more than a minute. “It is about 80 degrees Fahrenheit today.”

He sends a final photo at Parfums de Beyrouth. Contrary to its name, this is a Lebanese restaurant popular for its shish kebabs and garlic Sharma. My client and his colleagues have been dining here since they arrived in Switzerland. The food is 100 bob cheap and the lamb reminds them of home. “God knows that it is my desire to bring you here not just to see Paquis but the whole of Europe.” And with a hearty emoticon, he ends his messaging.

I fall. Literally with folder in the air, cell phone on the ground, and my 88 kilos supported by my knock knees and dainty palms. Kalu, a guy from whom I regularly buy vegetables, rushes to my aid. Another Samaritan hands me my cherished Blackberry. My goodness, I did not even realize I had reached the entrance to Amini. I collect myself. If only I could respond to his messages but company policy is company policy.2

04 AMINI: Datsun120Y…

X6? and three is the number of previous owners on the log book I jointly hold with the bank. I would need a really good convincing that this guy isn’t doing drugs. Three weeks back he was running around with a red A200 CDi sport and before that he was cruising with a machine of similar swank. Or perhaps he is in the business of defrauding hardworking Kenyans of their vehicles, at gun point. The more I internalize it, the more I feel very disgruntled about this Dominik guy.

Usishangae nani…” Peter interrupts my wonder as multiple emotions disfigure my already dark face. “Kuna masonko hii ‪‎Amini.” (There are wealthy people here in Amini)

He goes on to explain how Dominik did not make the grades to join the University of Nairobi and still could not secure a decent job even after completing an intensive engineering diploma course at the polytechnic. He took up a job as a mechanic at a nearby garage and on his father’s retirement, acquired the family’s turquoise Datsun 120Y for taxi business.

A few months into the hustle, a fellow cabbie suggested that if he wanted to get better paying clientele, he should trade his vehicle for something newer. All saved up, he got an automatic transmission Toyota Corolla that a couple he carried from Jomo Kenyatta International Airport and were moving back to the country from overseas asked to buy. 3 months worth of taxi business is the profit he made in this singular transaction. Phenomenal kill aye? Today he sells German hatchbacks; nothing less.

The four shillings change in my hand turn green with envy as they covet the numerous rectangular a thousand bob notes that lace Dominik’s black Diesel leather wallet.

Eh kweli biashara ya magari ni poa sana.” (The motor business is truly lucrative) I respond in a voice that heavily tries to conceal defeat.

I will for sure never get there. Ok maybe if I do drugs. How can I start? Someone anyone please introduce me to the trade! My spirit is desperate.

Ah mtu nguyaz, biashara ni ku-focus. Cheki kama mimi…” (Business is about focus my friend)

He explains how his 3 feet by 3 feet wooden kiosk of 5 years now returns a minimum profit of 5000 a day. “Unacheki…” He further elaborates how his daily target is to make at least 10 shillings from 500 of the almost 4000 potential customers that call Amini home. Bread and butter, sugar and sweets, milk and ‘mala’, exercise books and kilometric pens are his prized possessions. Not a wrought iron bed. Ok maybe I should become a shopkeeper but I do not think I can manage getting to work at 5.30am.

I ask him of difficult moments. He talks of a time he lost all his stock to rumours of contaminated milk and another time when what he thought was a clever decision almost cost him the shop.

Kuna wakati wagosa walihama na kila kitu jo! lakini Mungu yuko.” (There’s a time thieves took everything but God restores)

I nod in concerted agreement. It is 10pm. The night is black, it is clear that I am the one who has been on drugs; so defrauded of the truth but thank God for Peter! The moon is full, I feel hopeful, very hopeful. I bid him adieu.

Good night msupa!” He bids waving.2